The high of a great interview for the dream job you desperately want, that presentation you just had with the prospective client you courted for weeks or the proposal you finally sent in after moulding it into perfection. That high is followed by a great downward spiral, the wait. It’s a high for a reason. What goes up must come down. All good things must come to an end. And they do come to an end as the days go by. The first 24 hours are glorious. You are untouchable, you did the impossible, surprised even yourself. There is absolutely no way you aren’t going to be successful. Then the second day comes around and at first you are hopeful. It’s only been two days, no one makes such an important decision in just two days. By the end of the week you are a wreck. Doubts have all but clouded your mind. And your feeble mind succumbs to pressure, replaying everything over and over again, until there is nothing left to overanalyse. Did I smile too much? Or maybe I made a typo. Did I even shower that morning? What if I said the wrong thing and they were too polite to stop me? Maybe I should call them back. And you are plagued with all these negative thoughts that you start blaming yourself for being so optimistic, for having hope. Hope is for the weak after all. And finally you reach a resolve. It’s okay, you don’t need them. You are probably better off anyway. And on to the next one you go, restarting the cycle.
For what I am about to share to make sense, I need to give you a bit of background information. I am what my friends call an 'activity slut'. Its kind of a harsh term but completely factual. I am the kind of person who participates in literally everything that I come across, be it charity organisations, school related projects, societies, etc. If I feel like I could contribute something to any project I do it, without any hesitation. I love working with people and trying to make the lives of people around me better and being involved in all these projects gives me the opportunity to do just that. I also do it for selfish reasons, I want to leave a legacy that will live on for decades after I have left this earth. I want to be remembered by each and everyone I come in contact with. What? I am only human! But one thing I never do is get involved in anything where I am uncertain about its success. All my moves are calculated, I only take part in things I know for sure I will be...
Comments
Post a Comment